I’ve been called LOTS’o different things in the past almost 70 years. Some I liked, but others, well… No, I’m not going to list them!
A while back a friend called me “Sir James”. I didn’t remember ever being called that before. It surprised me. but I somehow knew it was going to mean something special. Then God began to show me that “Sir James” lived in my head and was the one who reminded me of all the things that brought me shame. I began to recognized his voice and I’m learning not to listen so intently.
I wrote about “Sir James” before… U can read that part HERE.
As the voice of “Sir James” becomes quieter and less invasive, I am better able to hear God’s quiet gentle whispers. Peace is becoming my new normal way of living. God is able to use softer and gentler means to direct me in His Ways.
I hear you ask: “How does the voice of Satan differ from the voice of Sir James?” All my life I was told Satan is a lier. He’s called the father of lies. Sir James never lied to me, because I would recognize the lies. (We grew up in the same body) However, <strong>I did not recognize the destructive power of the truth I heard from Sir James</strong>. He reminded me of all my failures. He caused me to wallow in my shame, and offered NO measure of grace.
Now that I have some distance from Sir James I see Satan in the midst. I was looking for the lies of Satan but I missed him in the truth that I was hearing.
I am now hearing a Higher Truth. Yes, it is absolute truth that I have a guilty past. The Higher Truth is that I am Forgiven. Yes, it is truth that in the 6th grade I stepped into a lifetime of unresolved shame. The Higher Truth is that I no longer have to wallow in that pit. (most days)
It is truth that I still stumble and fall. The Higher Truth is that my failure does not affect God’s Love for me. His Love and the price paid by His Son because of that Love allows me to come into His Presence with boldness and confidence.
I can even bring Sir James with me. That’s a good thing.
He’s still lives in me. I just don’t fear him as much as I used to.
Now, I have a Q4U – What’s the name of the other person that grew up in Ur body?
The one that just won’t leave U alone, The one U’ve been trying to run from?
After U name him/her, be sure to read Sir James – part 1
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Tiff: ThkQ so much for your comment!!
But now I’m going to have to write “Sir James” – #3. Something about “Sir James” not being able to come up with lies of his own, but being a master at repeating the lies of others.
Either way, the HIGHER TRUTH remains the Voice of Healing.
I call her Janelle. That is because that is what my mom originally wanted to name me.. She is that part of me that keeps telling me that I am not pretty enough, I am not good enough, I have failed… All the bad things that I learned to believe as truth over years of torment from other hurting humans… No matter what the song says, words do hurt.
I have leanred now that I don;t have to be enough for anyone but God.. and he made me so I am perfect! He still teaches and guides in the ways I need to live here on earth, like how to be the best wife and mom I can be.. but if I fail at a task, it is just that.. ONE task.. it does not have to reflect on me as a whole