Category Archives: SERENITY

Monday Mrng Musings:


Comes because of who U R,
Not because of what U DO

Thought # 2:

Does what U Do match who U R?

Thought # 3:

Do I know who I am?
Hmm, let me think about that!
Much more than I used to!

Q of the Day:


Please feel free to share your thoughts and comments. I’m feeling very muse-ical this morning.
I’ve learned(ing) to share my musings. In fact, my first blog was named “JimDCat’sMusings”
If / When I don’t share, I tend to dig myself a pit. Or… Do I stop sharing because I’m in a hole?
Either way, if / when I’m in a pit, the best way I’ve found to get out is to share.

I’ve never been able to THINK my way out of a place I’ve THOUGHT my way into
And…  I’ve never found serenity at the bottom of a pit!

GOD is still (my) God! and Jesus is still my friend!!
Even at the bottom of a pit! 

WOW!   I was just about to hit “post” and my friend Doña sent this as her every-day-scripture share.

 “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, (even if I’m in a pit) will be able to separate us from the Love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”                                                               Romans 8:38-39 (parentheses mine)

See what happens when I share?!?!!
GOD shows up!!


A year ago last week, I blogged about finding Treasure in the Trash. I’ve learned that when I bury the painful parts of my life, I ALWAYS bury some of the good that surrounds it.


That part of me I use to protect myself from the Hurts, Habits and Hangups that come from living this thing called LIFE can’t always tell the difference.

For the past 6+ years, I’ve been intentional about sorting out the lumpy carpet of my journey. (I got tired of tripping) I have discovered and recovered some Gold I thought was gone forever.

How’bout U?

Do U have some GOLD hidden in Ur past?
Have U done some digging and found some?
Share Ur times of toil with us!
Tell us about the treasure!


Don’t dig alone

I’d be honored for U to join!!
Click the FOLLOW button in the upper right corner

Today’s New Word

Which comes first? Comparing or Complaining?

Lately, I’ve realized (again) just how deadly comparisons can be.
I had an epiphany a while back. (I always wanted one of those! lol)
I realized the majority (all?) of the complaining I do comes because I compare.
I compare how other people in my life treat me with how I think I deserve to be treated.
I compare my life with what I expected it to be by now – Or with what I still want it to be… someday, tomorrow. Or with what I think I remember how it USED to be. I compare
my intentions with the results I see in the lives of others. I compare what I KNOW
is inside me with what others allow me to see in their lives. I  compare… with
sometimes – usually – deadly results. So often, the end result of my
comparing drives me into a pit. Then, I open my mouth…

I coined a new word the other day

verb – The act of complaining because we have compared and fallen short.
noun – The art of verbalizing an inner turmoil

Not all comparisons turn out like this…

my life

How many of us can say: “My life did not go as I planned“?
How do we get to the point of saying “But That’s OK!”

As I’ve said in previous posts, COMPARISON is a thief of joy.

About 2 years ago, I realized how fleeting gratitude was for me
I had seasons of appreciating what and who was in my life, but
then the storm would come and it would all blow away like smoke
One day I listened as a guy shared: “Hi, I’m ‘Joe’, I’m addicted to MORE!

Ah Ha!” said I, “That’s me!” Whatever I have in my life, I want – “MORE!
When I compare today with yesterday and have MOREI’m grateful for it
But if I compare and find less, Woe is me and all those around me…

I have perfected the art of COMPLAIRING.
i sometimes think I have a master’s degree in it.
But I’m learning – HE is teaching me,- to CHOOSE to be GRATEFUL

Philipians 4:6-8


More often than not, it’s the LITTLE THINGS I do that make a difference in my life and marriage.


For YEARS, I constantly had to pick up the soap when I was taking a shower. Most of the time, it was not because I dropped it, but because it slipped off the rack. No matter how carefully I placed the bar on the rack, it slid off. My wife got used to the sound of the bar hitting the basin, followed shortly thereafter by my grimace and groan as I bent over to pick it up.

The older I got, the more I groaned.

Then, one day I took a GOOD look at why this was happening. I saw the rack in a new way. I discovered one minor adjustment was all that was needed. The rack is designed with 5 bars… I pushed the front one up 1/8 of an inch. TaDa!!!   IT STAYED!!! Ever since that day, the only time I have to pick up the soap is when it slips out of my hand. My entire life is SO MUCH BETTER!!!! My frustration level is almost zero!! Well, in the shower, at least!!

If I take that lesson and apply it to the rest of my life, I find the same truth… It’s usually (more often than not) the minor adjustments that make the biggest lasting difference.

Sometimes, we need to see the situation through different eyes. (not recommended when showering) Sharing the hurts, habits and hang-ups of our past or present difficulties can lead to new insight from others. Discussing future plans with wise connections (U DO have some of those people U can call, right?) can help U make better decisions. Just taking time to get past the familiar frustrations can lead to a time of new perspective.

Sometimes, all that’s needed is a 1/8″ push in the right direction to bring an end to life-long frustrations! Go ahead – take a new look! I dare you!! What is your daily frustration? Yeah, that one, the one that just came to your mind!!

Baby Steps.
You didn’t get to where you are in one giant leap.
Take a Baby Step. Today!
Then, take the rest of the day off.
When Tomorrow becomes Today, do it again.
Repeat Daily!


A few months ago, my good friend, Angie posted on FaceBook:

                Someone told me you can know God’s path because it’ll be smooth &
                 filled with certainty. I’m not sure Jesus would agree
.” @John Alan Turner(pastor)

As she’s done before, she set my mind to spinning. She has a very unique way of doing that!

I responded with:

In a recovery meeting today, the topic was “Healing“. As I sat there listening and thinking, I realized that most of the healing in recovery for me has come in my relationships – with myself, with God, and with others. As I am learning to walk in that healing, my life has gotten a lot less hectic and stumbly.

Yes, that’s right, STUMBLY!  I like that word! That’s why I invented it.
It describes my life Pre-Process.

I no longer stumble and fall so hard over the lumps in the carpet I created by the secrets I hid.  My relationship with my past-self is being healed as I have found the safety and courage to stop hiding from it.

I no longer constantly stumble over the things I don’t understand, ’cause I know Somebody who understand everything and He promises to help me understand it when and if I need to.

I no longer stumble so severely over remarks that others say that hurt me, because I’ve come to know it may come from that place deep inside them that hurts like I did(and sometimes still do).

I no longer stumble over my faults. For most (all) of my life, I thought I needed to be better than I was so God would Love me more. As I’ve learned that God.Loves.Me.Just.As.I.Am. I’m amazed at how my faults are just not as important as they used to be. In fact, some of what I thought were my worst character defects have become some of my greatest strengths.

I no longer constantly stumble over people who don’t like me. Or who don’t approve of me. “Hey, this is me… Don’t like it? Let’s see if we can work it out. If we can’t, U go Ur way, I’ll go mine. I refuse to make my life stumbly because U don’t like me“. (I do realize you can’t, and shouldn’t do that with everyone)

I no longer stumble over my relationship with God. Recovery Step 3 says: “We made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God…”   All my life I was told: “Be careful, God’s watching you“. I understood that to mean “He’s watching so He can catch you when you do something wrong – and punish you“. Now, I KNOW! He’s watching because He loves me. He wants to catch me, yes, but He wants to catch me when I fall. He wants to guide me. He wants to comfort me. I now KNOW He will discipline me when I need it, not to punish me, but to teach me.

I no longer stumble (so much) over all the things left on my To-Do-List. One of the greatest sources of satisfaction for me has always been My.List!  If, at the end of the day I had lots of red stripes on the page, it was a good day. Frustration arose if I got stuck on something. Today, I am getting better at setting aside My.List! in favor of PEOPLE! My life is richer because of it.

Future Stumbles are no longer a huge worry for me. I’ve seen time and time and time again how God has been there for me and mine. I have seen His RELENTLESS FAITHFULNESS. He has used some of my hardest and most painful days to make my life the way it is today. I can therefore trust Him to continue to do that tomorrow, next week, next year.

OF COURSE, I’d like to still pretend my life is perfect and I never stumble and fall in the pit anymore. But that isn’t my reality. (And neither is it yours) But since the day of my “Heart Attack“, God & I (mostly God) have changed my life in ways I never imagined was possible.

T.B.T. aka ThrowBack Thursday

Well, I’ve thought long and hard about it, and resisted just as long as I can!  I’m finally going to join the T.B.T.’s.  On Thursdays, I want to post something from a year ago.

I wrote this last year after a discussion with a very good friend. We both learned from it.
Yes, I have to admit, I’m still learning the lesson. Over’nOver’nOver!

This is from Aug 3, 2013


Happiness & Joy

Which comes 1st?
Can we have one without the other?

comes from good happenings in our life.

comes from recognizing God’s Process in our life.

can(will!) sustain us – NO MATTER what’s happening around us

If U’re old enough(like me) U’ll remember the song – “Love”n Marriage… Go together like a horse’n carriage… U can’t have one without the other…” (Frank Sinatra)

It IS possible to have happiness without joy, joy without happiness.
I’ve certainly been known to confuse one for the other.

In the U.S.A., we have the constitutional “right to pursue happiness”. However, there’s no guarantee of finding it. Joy wasn’t even mentioned.

I’ve been attending Celebrate Recovery for almost 6 years. The common practice is to introduce ourselves: “Hi, my name is ‘Jim’. I’m a GRATEFUL believer in Jesus who struggles with…. ________ fillintheblank. Some Monday nights, it was easy to say “I’m grateful” Other nights, those words seemed to get stuck someplace beneath my tonsils. I finally began to realize I was measuring my gratefulness by my happiness. I was measuring my happiness by the good/bad happenings in my life.

NewsFlash: It wasn’t the good/nice things in my life that brought me to CR. It was the painful things. The out-of-control things. In CR language, it was the hurts, habits and gangups. Oops, that’s s’pose to be hangups! But actually, come to think of it, it was when the painful things outweighed the “blessings” that I looked for help. So yeah, I guess it did “gangup” on me.

It took me a long time to begin to recognize that the dark place was a gift. It took me longer to be grateful for the pain. It took even longer to acknowledge that God was using those things that had been ganging up on me to change me.

It’s been a PROCESS! A Process that has brought me more JOY than I knew existed.

I was pursuing happiness (I had a guaranteed legal right to do that) but what I discovered was JOY! I had the cart B4 the horse, or I had my carriage hitched to a goat,


or I was just pulling a broken wheel through the dirt, round’n round in circles.

Whatever, it was a mess.

I finally picked up the pieces of my mess and surrendered. Today, I gladly declare: I AM a GRATEFUL believer in Jesus. My life is not the mess it was. I am in Process – and will be as long as I live on this planet.

Now, the Q becomes: …If(since) I’m blessed, and grateful for it,
how can I in turn share that blessing with Others?